Resignation

It has come my friends, I have resigned from my place of employment in which I've been much less than happy for a year. I gutted it out knowing I would be moving. Today is my first official day of resignation and I'm loving it. I woke up an hour ago (11:30am), which never happens. Now I'm sipping on some coffee and relaxing. I have an entire month ahead of me like this, and I couldn't be more satisfied. I had double the amount of paid time off that I thought so I'll essentially be getting paid to sit on my ass all month, even better. It delights the shit out of me to know that I fucked my employer in the ass by dropping the bomb of resignation two weeks ago, leaving one lone part-timer to do the job of 7 people. It also delights the shit out of me to know they get to foot the bill of my PTO in this time of financial crisis. Fuck you very much!

Other happenings, I accepted an offer on my house Saturday. Nothing like waiting until the 11th hour. I had 13 days left on my contract with the realtor and BAM an offer crosses the table, I counter, they accept. The housing inspection went down yesterday and to my knowledge there were no big issues but I will not be 100% until it is in writing sometime today. One more inspection after that and we should seal the deal. So let's hope all goes well.

In regards to the house selling after a year of being on the market with only 1 prior serious interest that my damn neighbor sabotaged, I say to myself, "this is fucking crazy, 13 days left on the contract, 2 days of work left, and 1 month to go before I push off to Oahu, amazing." Then I'm reminded.....

About a year ago my manager suggested I bury a St. Joseph statue in my yard. I chuckle this off and think nothing of it. She's what you'd call a believer. Fast forward to 2 months ago when we're having a telephone conversation and she inquires about the house. I tell her nothing has come and I've resigned to the idea of hiring a property manager. She again brings up the statue of St. Joseph and tells me if i don't buy one she'll get one for me. So I laugh it off again, and while wasting time at work (I've become very versed at this the last 2 months), I google "St. Joseph Real Estate" and I'm smothered with stories of success. So I have a conversation with Spamela about this and we agree that WTF, it can't hurt. So I google religious stores on the west side and find on on Lorain Rd next door to Demetri's diner. I show up one night after work and am completely out of my comfort zone in this place. The nice dumpy looking woman rushes to my assistance and when I inquire about the statue she replies with "oh the real estate statue." To my surprise there are kits sold of St. Joseph with the history of the burying as well as specific directions on what to do. I purchase it, take it home, and study the rules. I'm so non-religious that I had no clue that St. Joseph was Jesus' foster father, Mary's beau. It clicked once I put the names together, Mary & Joseph.

Long story even longer, I was off a few days over 4th of July weekend and did some yard work. I slipped St. Joseph in my pocket and once out in the yard proceded to bury him, according to the directions in the kit. I forgot all about this until Sunday night while watching The Wire. The episode in which one of the detectives goes to a Gypsy about an unsolved case. She gives him a statue to bury, the next day a different case of his is solved. I then start howling in laughter as I realize I buried St. Joseph about 7 weeks ago and got an offer. I took a picture of the statue and was going to publish it on the blog in the event that I got an offer, but then I thought, this is horse shit and deleted the pic. Now I wish I had the pic for all of you to see. Don't fret, the directions say to dig him up once the sale is finalized so I can publish a dirty St. Joseph in Sept if/when the buyer takes ownership.

I emailed my ex manager first thing Monday morning. Her response was "See, you never know." Good ol' St. Joseph pulled through in the final hours. Is this coincidence? Perhaps. Is this God trying to convert me to a believer? Perhaps. Is this one of the best things to happen this year? Absolutely.

Peace out,
Medusa Jones